Final Piece Process

   I decided to use a circular piece of wood for my canvas as the wood represents the wildlife taking over in the dream and also consist of a dull colour showing the ruins in my visuals. Additionally, the circle was to represent the world created in the dreamers mind, instead of being a sphere like the actual Earth, its flat to convey how it isn't real. Furthermore, i like the idea of the viewer to be able to spin the wood to blur the image to convey the confusion and spiral down into constant daydreaming to escape anxiety. This was inspired by the ballet dancers i looked at, particularly a drawing i did from a birds eye view to show the circular motion of the skirts when spinning. However, as i have no experience in making my art kinetic after looking into ways to making the piece spin i thought it was best to develop it differently. I plan to paint the eyes of the dreamer on this to show how they are trapped inside their world as well as show how intimate their dream is without actually showing it as no one else can see other peoples dreams.
   I began by adding materials for the base of the canvas. I stuck down ripped cardboard with ridges exposed to show the falling apart ruins that represent the disconnection from reality that is being lost through dreaming too much. I also randomly stuck down ripped layered pieces of paper from a fantasy book. I really like this material as a background as it conveys broken pieces of the mind. I also plan on leaving gaps in the painting of the eyes to be undeveloped drawings, showing the materials under.
    Next i roughly painted white patches onto the board. At first i was going to paint the whole top half of the board white so the colours would brighter on top. However, i decided to continue the falling apart image so i would make it patchy by only painting sections so the wood still shows through some parts of the paint. I used a paint brush that had dried brush hairs, making them hard and able to create rough paint strokes. Then on the bottom half of the board, i forced the rest of the paint off the brush by forcefully painting the fading lines. I had previously created this effect in other work and really enjoyed creating a faded layer of paint on top of other work. Then i remembered my decision to use the scribbling technique when drawing so i went over these straight lines to create more loose, scribbled lines to convey loss and confusion.
    To develop this further, i scribbled out lyrics from my chosen song "Dont Delete the Kisses" by Wolf Alice. I chose lyrics from various parts of the song that i felt was most relevant to convey the feelings of being lost in the dream world. "I see the signs of a life time you , til i die. What if its not meant for me, love. I wanna tell the whole world about you i think that thats a sign, i'm losing self control and its you it really is. You've turned me upside down and thats okay I'll let it happen cause i like having you around. Me and you were meant to be in love, me and you were meant to be in love.Me and you were meant to be in love. Me and you." I believe these lyrics show how dependent the dreamer becomes on their dream to escape anxiety, furthermore how they accept and dont want to stop dreaming. I also liked the link to "world", "turned upside down" and "losing self control" as that is what i am trying to convey by allowing the viewer to spin the wood. Lastly, i repeated the last few lines to show the obsession with dreaming and strongly convey how often the person zones out from reality and become more isolated. I hair sprayed the biro, causing it to drip and spread the ink but also faded some words on the wood which i haven't seen before when doing this technique on paper. I felt the fading worked perfectly to show the loss of identity of the dreamer.

    Next, i started to layer up the paint. Using the same rough paint brush as before i started with the colours yellow, red and green. These colours represent happiness, lust and logic that make the dream seem so appealing, however anxiety and fear begin to build up as it is ignore instead of dealt with. Thats why i layered the colours purple and blue on top to show it taking over. I also dripped these colours over the bottom half to show the loss of control over the dream and could represent tears. I only did the colours around the edge as the image of the dreamers eyes go in the centre. Personally i think these colours need to be built up to have a larger impact. Especially the blue and purple as they are the emotions that are damaging and trapping the dreamer.

   I drew out the eyes of the girl inspired by the girl on the cover of the Wolf Alice album, "Visions of a Life". Using biro, i used the scribbling technique to draw and shade the left eye. I found the biro struggled a little to draw on the wood. Furthermore, i think the way i have drawn the eye made me lose something in the scribbling style. For instance i think i should of shaded around the eye as well so the technique looks more effective. The eyelashes are difficult o see due to the shading behind it as well.
   Next i mixed a couple of pale shades for her skin tone. I used the dried brush to create rough paint strokes and created patches in her skin to create layers. I found this difficult to do around the eye to create the shading for the eyelid. I personally dislike how dark the eyelid crease is and need to soften it. Furthermore, i dislike the cartoon sense of the face, however feel it is fitting as it adds to the artificial, made up side of dreams.
   Due to the size of the canvas i ended up drawing the forehead too small. I continued with the patchy painting on the hair. I used the biro to draw over some of the paint, add thin lines to the hair and eyebrows. I think i should have built up the biro on some sections of the face however preferred the idea of losing the identity so it made more sense to have the biro exposed under the paint.
   Lastly, i built up the paint. I dripped some skin colour paint from the face down so it merged with the other drips. Furthermore, i built up the blue and purple paint on the canvas as i wanted them to be more dominant. I mixed in tiny plastic balls with the paint to create a rough texture as well as create spikes in the paint. That way the paint was reaching out of the canvas to show how the anxiety is from the dreamers reality. Additionally, i made the paint layer on top of the girls face as if it was reaching into her mind and taking over her life. I dripped blue paint from the girls eye to show how she is suffering and upset.
   To improve this i would focus on making the spikes more pointy as most of them folded over. Furthermore, i would make the biro in the hair in the scribbling technique as i lost it when trying to draw hair strands.
    I also took this photo of the shadow of my hand reaching down on the canvas. I liked creating sections of the face with some hidden in shadows as it creates this depth as the dreamer begins to lose them self. Hopefully when i have completed my final piece i would have a chance to mess around with some lighting.

        I also created a shadow using old film on the canvas and found it projected the images onto the canvas. The images in the film were of my two oldest brothers, playing football and various outside scenes. I felt these were fitting as dreaming is a big part of childhood with make belief play. Maladaptive daydreaming begins in early teens years. Additionally the wildlife scenery suited the sense of the overgrown wildlife taking over in my visuals.
  Some of the photos were pitch black showing how the dreamer fills these voids with their dreams to cover it up and fulfil their life. However not realising that its taking over and they are not missing out on their real life. I stuck the last one down that was completely clear to show how they are missing out on their real life. At first i stuck these down using PVA glue then decided to use hot glue as it wasnt working efficiently. I wanted to stick the film around the edge as it mimics an old film projector where the film is on a  circle when played, showing this need for movement. However, the film fell off from around the edges again so i decided to leave that idea behind and look into different ways to re use the film.

    I couldnt decide how to stick down this piece of ripped netting covered in purple paint to show fear. I wanted it to cover one of the eyes to create a barrier between the real world and their mind, disconnecting them. However, i didnt want to cover up the eyes as they were done differently and it would hide that fact difference.
   I tried to place the netting over both eyes in a way that still showed sections of the details. I decided this worked best as it showed both sides and how the person is completely disconnected from reality and interacting with others.